I have 89 emails in my inbox. I should read them.  Or sort them.  Or something. I should be working.  Or keeping my kids from drowning our potted plants in their pool water. But I'm not. I haven't been here for about 3 months.  Three days after my last post, my oldest biological daughter's father passed away unexpectedly, and I didn't know how to deal with telling the world.  A wild mix of emotions was involved, including past hurts, what ifs, anger, some depression, grief.  You name it, I felt it.  Then dealing with his family--that was a whole issue…